Tuesday, August 5, 2008

100th Post Spectacular Is Nothing Compared to 125,000 Gorillas


Great News Wednesday Tuesday...
100th EIGN post spectacular...
125,000 Gorillas we didn't know about...
BIG FOOT.

As reported, well, everywhere, the "Mother Load" of Western Lowland Gorillas were found in the forests of the Congo. (npr)

And the question both of your co-founders, writers, and generally apocalyptic Earth is Going Nova friends want to know is, if there is still a place on earth that can hide 125,000 fucking apes, why can't there be a few Big Foots hanging around somewhere. Hell, even Jane Goodall said once in 2002, on National Public Radio, that she believes they exist.

125,000 gorillas is an astonishingly large amount of apes. It has basically doubled the number thought to have existed in the wild before this find.

Skeptics argument against a big foot, sasquatch, or yeti, saying that there is no way such a large creature could still exist without being discovered has simply been thrown out the window.

We here at EIGN, namely Pete and I, are putting together a Big Foot search party, likely to depart to the north western states of the US sometime in 2009. All those interested are urged to contact us. The race for such a great find is on, and we're going to beat Jane Goodall, and her rag-tag bunch of scientists, conservationists, and interns, to the punch.

And Big Foot, if you're reading this, don't worry we're not going to hurt you, turn you in, put a graining video of you on youtube, or sell you out in the name of profit or anything else. Just don't hurt us when we find you.

As an aside: Thanks to all of our loyal EIGN readers--all two of you. We never would have made it to this 100th post without you and all of your support. We've had fun so far and we hope to see you at post 200.

No comments: